The Best Monday in a While

It seems like things just clicked for me today, much like a jigsaw falling into place. First I got my tax number which was required in order to get a bank account. Then I went to Garanti and opened a bank account, which was required in order to get a residency permit. I have an appointment for next Tuesday to get the permit. In the meantime, I have to gather a couple of forms, get some passport photos, and put some money in my new account.

After he bank, Kuthan, Murat and myself went to go apartment hunting (for me). We looked at a couple furnished apartments and one non-furnished one.Of the furnished ones, both were in really nice locations and much cheaper than you'd expect for being where they are. In looking at these apartments I went to Kadıköy for the first time. It was awesome! There were pedestrians everywhere walking narrow brick streets lined with bars and cafes. Many of the people were in their late teens and early twenties. It was just such a vibrant atmosphere. In between apartment visits, the three of us went for burgers. Mine was a garlic mushroom burger. It was super delicious. After the meal, the waiter asked me if the burger I just had was better than the ones in the states. I answered yes, though honestly it really depends.In the evening we watched a movie together, ate dinner, and then went to Murat's place to watch a football match. While there, I called a close friend from Skype and also chatted with Murat's dad a bunch. The conversation eventually found its way to Scottish music and bagpipes, at which point Murat produced from nowhere, a bagpipe. He claimed that it didn't work. Immediately I jumped up to investigate. Then Kuthan joined the effort and after a short while, Ahmet (Murat's dad) came to help. I learned a whole lot about how a bagpipe works. After about an hour of fiddling with reeds and pipes, we discovered that the biggest problem was a leak in the bag. Still it was fun to try to get the thing to work. We all really put our heads together on it.Still in a problem-solving mood, my eye caught the Bulmaca section of the newspaper. Bulmaca is basically a crossword puzzle for anyone who doesnt know. I never get more than 2 or 3 of the words (out of about 30-40 maybe). The reason for this is obvious. First of all I have to understand the clue and secondly I have to know the answer! Both are of a low likelihood. Well I studied the board and answered a couple of the questions. They were easy though. For example, the first one I got was "Rusça evet" which is "Russian yes". Da being the obvious answer. Murat, Kuthan, and Ahmet came to help me out. At one point, I noticed the clue "Sezen Aksu şarkısı", which corresponded to the largest answer on the board. A few of the letters were filled in. This is what I had to work with:

_ _ _ _ _ D _ _ I _ _ Z

I stared at it for a short time and then the answer faded into my mind's view. Masum Değiliz. I pointed the answer out to Ahmet who had the pen. He was genuinely shocked out of his mind. He suggested that I might be a reincarnated Turk. I explained that a close friend once introduced me to the music of Sezen Aksu, and in fact Masum Değiliz was one of the first songs of hers that I ever heard.A similar moment occurred a short while later with the clue "Elif Şafak bir roman". I only know the titles of two of her books, but one of them happened to be the answer. It was Araf. It turns out I have read this one (the English translation of course). Curiously I read the book on the suggestion of that same close friend.

Monday had success, apartments, good food, bagpipes, and Bulmaca. It's been the best Monday in a while.

The Middle of Everywhere

Finding myself in between happy and sad, relaxed and stressed, confident and worried, and busy and calm, spending the day in the middle village of Ortaköy was a perfect choice and not just for the name. Even the weather was neither good nor bad with bouts of rain and sun, warmth and cool. At times sure of the rain, but unsure if my mood was a cloud or a bow, I did the best thing that I could. I surrounded myself with friends and beautiful scenery. For these in between days I feel alright floating, not deciding, not settling. Just be who you are, someone who loves me told me.

Safiye came to join. It was only when I was in her company that I realized how bored I had been sitting, relaxing, pondering, and not moving. We soon got up and went for a walk. The more I get to know this place (Ortaköy, the city of İstanbul), the more it is new to me. Sure, sparks of familiarity illuminate my mind for an instant like the realization of a pattern. I remember looking at that table of jewelery before. There was that same oldish woman and there was a peculiar cat walking upon that table first time as I recall. What was it about that cat? It was fluffy maybe, cute? old? Beautiful I think. And the old woman was telling us some story. I try to replace the old memories with a new one as I pass by.

I saw three women taking pictures of each other at a scenic point and like a reflex offered to take one of all three of them. Then they offered to take ours, snapping the one below.Safiye and I returned to Destan to rejoin Kuthan and some friends to watch the Manisa-Galatasaray match. At halftime we left again to drink some beer at a bar that is kind of becoming 'our bar'. I think I would like to have a place with everyone. It can be a particular place to eat, or a place with a view. Then I will always think of them when I return to that place alone. I realize that I already have places with many people, though we may not have acknowledged it yet.
Though the weather had gotten better, I wondered why my mood seemed to sink like a bucket into a well. Not all the way to bottom, rather it hung somewhere in the middle, suspended. Like everything in my life today. Then I realized that I had been staring out the window at the awning below. Something about it struck me. Then it I connected it: the color. The rope slipped and the bucket plunged. The dim dark green like that of fake spruce trees matched that of the lamppost in Beşiktaş and the nearby Starbucks sign and the color of the jacket worn by someone who moments later punched me to see if I was really there. Remembering the punch seemed to stop my runaway thought train. Looking back at it, was it really the color? Was that all? I glanced out the window again. It was like a switch. A flood of previously-forgotten memories washed in and out of my mind. They were specific moments from earlier visits: a glance, a glass of beer, an afternoon at the pool, a barrel of joy, a bottle of stress, sickness, helpful, helpless. Snap out of it the voice in my head screamed to itself. The rope winding quickly, the bucket rising back above the surface but holding water. I faked a yawn and wiped my eyes. It was the damn color.

Gripin played over the speakers. Durma Yağmur Durma. Safiye and I spoke only Turkish for a short while. At first it was difficult but then it felt so nice. Sometimes when I started to lose my balance, she would catch on to what I was trying to say and then finish the sentence for me and then continue which was nice because the conversation moved but still I learned from it.

We returned for the last time to Destan where Safiye left, and I talked with Kuthan, Furkan, and Sayra about many intellectual things such as politics, philosophy, and emigration. It really got me thinking about my place in Turkey and what I will do with my time here. Everything seems to come back to that. In the US I never questioned my role in the country, I just lived it because it was all I knew. But here I feel a greater responsibility, like I have to find/earn my place here.

Eventually, inevitably, the conversation lost its intellectual flavor and became an exchange of stories about various encounters with girls/women. I preferred hearing the others' stories to sharing my own. There will be other times for that. Anyway, it was a fun topic and the time just disappeared.

A Week Later

I have now been in the country for a week. It feels nice that the weekend is finally here again.
Friday was lovely. I took myself from Bostancı to Nişantaşı for my meeting. I was excited about the meeting but not that excited about trying to get to the other side of İstanbul by myself. I haven't always had the best of luck getting around in this city. Today was an exception though. I got to Taksim and asked for some help, then I walked from Osmanbey in what I thought was the direction to Nişantaşı. After 10 minutes of not seeing anything to indicate I was going the right direction (other than of course the Sun and the coincidence of its position in the mid afternoon sky with the piece of map I had glanced at 20 minutes earlier and the direction I was walking). Still I was about to start panicking, when I overheard part of a conversation in Turkish a passerby was having. He said something like he was near Nişantaşı and would be there in a few minutes. He as walking my direction. I followed him at a distance and within a few minutes arrived to a spot just meters away from the building I was looking for.

The meeting went well. Eren Bey and I discussed many aspects of my plan here. He really got me rethinking my strategy a bit. I'm not going to change my whole plan, but I think I will package it in a better way. More specifically, Eren showed me a way that I can pursue all of my interests here without really having to put any on hold. Ok I guess that wasn't too specific either. I don't want to say anything more about it right now because the ideas are soaking in my head and I have some things to look into.
When I thanked Eren Bey and left, I found my way back to Bostancı and eventually to Dragos through the combined use of the metro, a dolmuş, and a train. It was with relative ease that I got from one to the other. I really felt nice knowing that I can get around on my own here. A real confidence-building day this was.

Friday evening brought the week to a an excellent close. Kuthan and I gathered at Murat's place for a big dinner of schnitzels. In addition to the awesome meal, we also hung out a bunch playing instruments, watching our favorite videos on YouTube, and discussing various topics. Also there was the Bursa-Antep game of which the final score was correctly predicted by Kuthan 25 minutes into the match.
Saturday will be largely spent in Ortaköy. I'm really hoping to run into some of my other friends then because I have missed them this week. Of course now that I finally know how to get around, it shouldn't be so hard running into them during the week. I have a lot on my plate but also a lot of joy waiting for me everyday.

encouraged, ready

I rested again for much of today. I hate resting. Of course it is supposed to be relaxing but I want to get on with my life and lying around trying to get better from a what is now a mild cold is not my idea of progress. In the afternoon, Kuthan and I left to run a few errands. I'll skip over the bulk of what happened and just say that it seems crazy to me that I should have to get a passport officially translated before using it to get a document from the tax office. Seriously?? Can't I just tell them where it says my name and last name? I mean I was already at the gorram (oh Firefly) tax office. For the last time... errrrrrrg Turkish bureaucracy, how I loathe you. But with that out of the way, I went to the translator and go that stuff worked out. I'm still jumping through the hoops that come with the transition. For all my complaints about the system, I am thankful that there is a way through it. Truth be told it is not that bad as far as these things go.
After a long afternoon, we met up with Murat and went to Fenerbahçe for hookah and beer. We talked about our plans for tomorrow and the weekend. As it got dark, a breeze picked up off the water. I love the smell of the sea. I love the narrow streets and the sidewalk trees. These things I love and these things I enjoyed this evening.
I often like to romanticize at the end of these posts about how great the next day is going to be, but this time, it's really going to be a good one. In the morning I will run a few errands. Afterward I will go to Nişantaşı to spend some time alone, exploring, and then to meet with someone who can probably help me get established here. After that I will return for a special evening at the home of Murat and his family. There will be pictures and stories and probably good news.